Drama was my middle name growing up. It was so rooted in my brain that in order to get attention or to feel noticed I would start a little show. Even as a young adult I will catch my self-starting a show, or saying things just to see if people are really noticing me.
Even now, I like to put on a show for God. I like to take what he tells me and run with it in the wrong direction. I like to battle him see if I really need to do what he is telling me to do, or if I could possibly do only half of what he is telling me to do. For there must be someone better, I mean if we get right down to the core of it all God won’t notice me unless I cry out to him and put on a cute little show for him to tell him how someone is so much more worthy or equipped than I, RIGHT?!?!
If we would like to go even deeper, my sweet little brain thinks drama is my only emotion! For if I dare let you in past the drama, past my show, then you might get up and leave. I may open up and let you see backstage you then might find the locked doors where all my mess is…. And that would be why I put on a show to get noticed, but the close the curtains before the ending.
Good thing is God is the best director around. Good thing is my mess is unlocked. Good thing is the dramatics got cut. Good thing is I am learning to let people backstage. Good thing is my God has grace for me every day. Good thing is I’m learning to love and be loved in return. Good thing is God notices me right where I am, not when I throw a fit. Good thing is I am loved by this team, who is calling me out into my fullness. Good thing is I am worthy. Good thing is God loves me today the same as yesterday, dramatics or not.
Good thing is YOU are loved today the same as a millions yesterdays! Do you believe it? Do you believe that you are the star of his show and he wants you to play the greatest you that you could ever be?
I’m learning to be raw and to be REAL with him. To let him backstage to see my mess, for he wants to clean it up and take it away forever. I dare you to be raw with him!
Love love love,
Breanne Coe
