I have loved to sing for as long as I can remember. My family and I gather around the old mahogony piano at my grandma's house each year to sing carols together. With my grandpa's bass voice anchoring the family, the rest of us join in with altos, sopranos, and tenors. My siblings and I belt out bluegrass songs while doing the dishes at home. My mother, sister, and I sing in three part harmony with my dad and brothers on the guitar. I have always loved music; the way that intertwined voices create beautiful, moving melodies. When I gave my life to the Lord, I began to love worship. I loved using my voice to sing praises to my creator, but I always seemed to hold back a part of myself in worship, but I didn't know what it was.
The other day, my iPod was on shuffel and a Copeland song came on with the lyrics, "Sing, not because you love to song, but because you love to sing". Those lyrics made me think about my mindset in worship. Sometimes, I found myself singing the song simply because I loved the song; I loved the notes layered on top of eachother, making beautiful, lyrical lines of music; sometimes I forgot that I was singing because I loved to sing for Jesus.
Being in Africa and witnessing the people worship has given me a fresh perspective and God has used that to change my heart for worship. The Masaai in Tangitatu and the Pokot worshipped with complete abandonment and sang with such passion. The people worshipped late into the night, singing songs with the same exact beat and the same melody, often for 4 hours at a time-but they never lost their enthusiasm, their joy, their reverance for the Lord! In Karati with the Kikuyu tribe, I saw old women who could barely stand on their achy joints sing with their hands raised high to the heavens-; and even though they were out of tune, it was a beautiful, pleasing song to the Lord. In Pokot, I saw people dancing and praising with such joy, even though their only intrument was and old tambourine. In Kijabe, I saw people who were 3 years old to 97, all with the same joy and passion and loveas they sang out at the top of their lungs.
I have realized more and more how pridefull I had been in worship. I had based worship on the feeling that I had, on how much I loved singing each song. But, the Lord has been teaching me and showing me how to come back to the heart of worship–to remember why I am singing–not because I love the song, but because I love to sing praises to my savior. For the Lord is so worthy, so deserving, of our praise.
"Because Your steadfast love is better than life, my lips will praise you. So I will bless your name as long as I live; in your name I will lift up my hands"-Psalm 63:3-4
